{"id":1909,"date":"2020-05-15T11:32:02","date_gmt":"2020-05-15T18:32:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dearsmartphone.com\/?p=1909"},"modified":"2020-05-15T11:32:02","modified_gmt":"2020-05-15T18:32:02","slug":"digital-grandparents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/staging-x.bemobilesmart.com\/clonepath\/digital-grandparents\/","title":{"rendered":"Digital Grandparents Stay Connected"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large wp-duotone-default-filter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"298\" height=\"169\" src=\"https:\/\/staging-x.bemobilesmart.com\/clonepath\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/05\/nyt_grandma.jpeg\" alt=\"Photo of a cute little girl on a computer  screen interacting with her Grandparents. From a longer NYT article.\" class=\"wp-image-1910\" title=\"Digital Grandparent\"\/><figcaption>The Digital Grandparent. NYT, 11\/26\/2008 James Estrin<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-drop-cap has-light-gray-background-color wp-block-paragraph\">Dear Ms. Smartphone: Do you think we are going to have trouble getting connecting in- person after spending so much digital time? I am the digital grandparent as I watch the kids for an hour or two online while their parents work from home. The younger kids and I play board games or \u201cclean house\u201d together. Then I help the older ones with an (online) entry for our Marin County Fair. But, when we finally get to see each other in person, will it be different?\u00a0 Eileen, Tiburon<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dear Eileen: It\u2019s a fine question- how will we reconnect when we are able to get together again?&nbsp; I checked in with a good friend, who like you, is watching grandkids online. She says they \u201csneaked in&#8221; an in-person visit for Mother\u2019s Day, and it was a joyous reunion. There was no hesitation on the part of the eighteen month old to bond with Grandma and Grandpa.  More recently, this story from the WSJ, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wsj.com\/articles\/families-begin-to-emerge-from-their-quarantine-bubbles-carefully-11589481749\">says families are developing \u201cre-entry plans.\u201d <\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Far Apart?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You mentioned that you spend time almost every day online. That is the key factor.&nbsp; Time is one of the enabling things we can give online,  because we can re-purpose the period we would have spent on the road or in the car. For established relationships \u2026.putting in time is a key factor, just showing up!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">However, the dynamics might be different for interaction if the children\/grandparents had not known each other in person before going online.  <a href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2008\/11\/27\/us\/27minicam.html\">A sociologist reports in the NYT that  that nearly half of American grandparents live more than 200 miles from at least one of their grandchildren and two-thirds see one set of grandparents just once a year or less.<\/a>  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In the same article, noted author <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Sherry_Turkle\">Sherry Turkle<\/a>, a professor at MIT, worries that ever-more-real virtual encounters (think holograms) could make us forget what we are missing in the case of a grandchild: the smell of a grandmother\u2019s cooking, the warmth of an embrace. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">IRL vs Digital (State Fairs)<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But, back to happy\u2026.It\u2019s great that you are working on an actual project with a real deadline with your grandkids.&nbsp; Here is one story you might want to talk this one over with the older kids, so that you both become aware of how  &#8216;sharing virtually&#8217; changes behaviors:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2020\/05\/13\/us\/coronavirus-virtual-county-fairs.html?\">Most county fairs and live events have been cancelled this summer<\/a>, as you mention. IRL, we enter tasty home-made pies, take rides that spin, and in the &#8216;4H&#8217; animal ring, judge animals that are best-in-show. Kids that raise farm pets will miss transporting the beastie to the show, then the live showmanship, and, of course, the smells (!) . As the rules change, so does the digital entry:  contestants might fluff up Muffie&#8217;s coat or add bulk, with Photoshop, that is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are lots of ways that our activities change when we go online, and we learn to look at things differently. If you are watching older kids online, it&#8217;s  good to mull this over and get their perspective. Hopefully, we can use our technology to develop more intense personal relationships with the people we love. And,&nbsp; when we do see them, it will be nice to reach out, smell, and touch.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-buttons is-layout-flex wp-block-buttons-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-button\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link\" href=\"digital-grandparents\/#comment\">Add A Comment<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Digital Grandparents: &#8220;Move Grandma so she can see me at the State Fair&#8230;&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1910,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1909","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-young-children-and-media","category-online-relationships"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Digital Grandparents Stay Connected - BeMobileSmartTHE CLONE<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How can digital grandparents who watch their grandkids online learn to reconnect in person. 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